He was the last puppy in the litter. The one that nobody seemed to want.
He had the same big eyes as all of his brothers and sisters and his fur was just as solid black as all the others…but…he WAS much smaller, and thinner and he had to admit…weaker than his siblings. Yes…he was the “runt” of the litter.
It seemed that no one would ever want to adopt Runty and his human family had even stopped advertising and had taken down the sign that offered “Genuine Scottie Puppies!” from their front window.
Then one rainy morning a knock on the door was to change Runty’s life forever.
“Hello…I’m Mrs. Wilson. My son Todd has been very sick for a long time and our family decided that a new puppy might help him to feel better. Do you still have any puppies left?”
“Well…there’s just one…but I’m afraid it’s the runt of the litter…in fact we named him “Runty”.
“Ohhh…” Mrs. Wilson exclaimed as Runty had run to the door and was jumping up and down around her feet.
“My…he’s lively….and he’s REALLY cute isn’t he?” Mrs. Wilson bent down and patted Runty on his head.
“Would you like to come home with me…ah….Runty?”
Runty let out a short sharp bark and began licking Mrs. Wilson’s hand.
So Runty was adopted and went home with Mrs. Wilson where he met for the first time…little Jimmy Wilson.
Jimmy was in his sick bed but leaned down and helped Runty jump up onto the covers. Jimmy smiled and petted Runty and the Scottie rolled over and nuzzled the boy’s hand and licked his fingers.
Then Jimmy sat up and placed the pillows behind his back and Runty climbed into the boy’s lap. It was the first time that the boy had sat up in bed in more than a week. Jimmy’s Mom stood in the bedroom doorway and smiled wider than she had in a very long time.
As the weeks passed Jimmy grew healthier and Runty grew bigger and stronger too. It wasn’t long before they were going for walks around the neighborhood and soon Jimmy was well enough to resume attending Parks Middle School.
Two months later Jimmy’s school held a dog show. Jimmy brushed and trimmed Runty’s fur and taught him how to “heel” which is when Runty walks along at the same speed as Jimmy staying exactly at the boy’s heel.
Well…Runty won “Best in Show” and sported a bright blue and gold ribbon on his collar!
Oh…and just for the record…Two of Runty’s siblings were in the show too but it was Runty that everyone voted for.
The Kid by russ mckay
Feb 26
Grandpa Sanders was looking high and low. Into every drawer and into every closet and even into every mirror although his grandson Mark didn’t know what his Grandpa was searching so much for, especially in mirrors.
“Ah Papa…what are you trying to find?”
“Oh….I’m looking for something that I think I lost and can’t seem to locate.”
“Maybe I can help Papa.”
“Naw…I don’t believe so. It’s all up to me and me alone to find it.”
“Well…what is it Papa? Is it a book or a piece of jewelry…or a key…yeah…you are always losing your keys.”
“No…not those things. I lost something that you should never ever lose. Something you need everyday no matter how old you get to be.”
Mark was searching around under chairs and behind cabinets but admitted he actually was just trying to be helpful and had no clue as to what his grandpa had lost.
Then Grandpa Sanders stopped and squatted down and spoke directly at Mark.
“You’ve still got it and I want you to promise me you’ll never lose it no matter what!”
“Ah…well OK Grandpa…but it would help a whole lot to know what it is that I should never lose.”
“The “KID” in you. Even after you grow up and be a man and even when you get to be as old as me…always keep that kid that you are today inside of you.”
“Well…I think I kinda see what you mean Grandpa.”
Then Mark started to think and then a huge smile lit up Mark’s formerly sad face and he took his Papa’s hand.
“C’mon Grandpa…I think I know where you can find it again.”
Mark led Grandpa Sanders outside into the backyard and onto the playground filled with swings and a sliding board.
His Papa started to smile and run, not too fast, but still running, straight for the sliding board, climbed to the top and as he whooshed down the slide yelled out an unmistakable “WHEEEE!” and just about at the middle of the slide, Mark’s Grandpa found his lost “KID”.
Baby Talk by russ mckay
Feb 20
Jibber, Jabber, Jibber
Is how it sounds to you
But just between us babies
It’s “Hey there Bud what’s new?”
You see we have a language
We infants fresh as dew
But we only use it when we see
Other babes who see us too
And we don’t like huge bulging heads
That suddenly appear
Staring down upon us
Too big and way too near
And what’s that you are saying?
Sounds faintly like some words we use
We like your smiles and funny face
But what’s with those “Goo Goo’s”?
It’s easy chatting babies up
We’re a friendly bunch
The only time we’ll stop our talking
Is when it’s time for lunch!
But the real tough thing for us is
Right before we’re two
We must learn a whole new language
Just to talk to you!
A Charmed Life by russ mckay
Feb 13
“Hey, watch out with those pliers bud, I ain’t stainless steel you know!”
The gold heart was being added to the other 17 charms already on the link chain. It was Valentine’s Day.
“Put me next to that gold world charm not that Scottie dog. Hey are you listening up there buddy?”
“Grrrr.”
“Ah…Hi what’s your name nice little puppy?” Heart was dangling awfully close to that ferocious canine charm and found absolutely nothing “charming” about him.
“Grrrr….KILLER! That’s me!”
Then “Heart” looked to the other side of where she was dangling and there was an Eiffel Tower that was swinging too close and then… “Ouch!”
“Hey watch your pointy top there. You can hurt someone!”
“Pardonnez Moi! C’est la vie!”
But as the bracelet, with Heart added, was gifted to the lucky Lady she singled out the new charm and rubbed the surface and said “I love it!”
Eventually, Heart made friends with the Scottie by complimenting him and Eiffel Tower taught her to speak conversational French.
Occasionally Heart would call over to the other charms across the wrist and after a fairly short time all were friends. With her change in attitude, Heart had indeed charmed them all!
“
Drew looked around but there wasn’t anyone else in his studio and indeed it was earlier than he usually started to draw his syndicated daily cartoon column of a dachshund that always seemed to be too short too long and in too much trouble!
Drew took a sip of his morning coffee and as he put the very first line down on the white paper with his black inked pen, the line began to move all on its own. Drew was startled! This had NEVER happened before…and how could it? It was IMPOSSIBLE!!! Wasn’t it?
“
“Ah…D…Doodley?”
“Yeah who else…you really have limited talent you know. I always look the same, act the same…do the same stupid stuff…and I’m gettin’ sick of it!”
The line had magically and mysteriously continued to draw itself until the Doodley character was way too large and pushing his two-dimensional snout right up off the paper and yelling at Drew even without the customary word “balloon”!
“I…ah…..I don’t have to listen to you
“Ah….not so hasty Drew….I…..was perhaps a bit too coarse in our discussion of my rights as a famous, well….semi-famous cartoon!”
“That’s better. But you must know Doodley that there are strict sizes for frames and length of cartoons set by the papers….so I just can’t draw anything, any size, anyway…I want to.”
“Well….I’ve seen double wide frames on even some of the most famous cartoon strips. I look around you know….at the competition as it were
“Part of your…ah….charm to readers is that you ARE long and short and seem to be tightly fitted in the frame. That’s part of the fun Doodley.”
“Not for me Pal.” Doodley’s outline had gotten smaller as he calmed down and he was almost back to normal size.
“You are just going through a bit of a time when you aren’t happy right now but perhaps I can fix that. Tell you what….let me draw today’s strip with a new idea that I just had and I bet you’ll be fine with it. But you’ve gotta promise me….NO MORE jumping out of the pages
“Well….we have been together for a long time ….so I promise….but ONLY if I’m happy about it!” Doodley said, now completely back to normal size.
Drew finished the strip and in the last frame was Doodley smiling bigger than he’d ever smiled….standing right next to his new very feminine cute companion with the yellow bow “Doodles.”
The birthday celebration was over and Sam the Kingsnake was writing Thank You cards to all of his friends that had brought presents to his party.
He thanked Carl the Centipede for the pair of new red leather shoes even though Sam had no feet, which even a casual observer should have noticed.
Of course, Carl had a hundred feet and so, he naturally fancied himself a shoe “expert”.
Then Sam wrote to Roger Raccoon to thank him for the bright red comb even though, once again, it should have been noted by all that Sam had no hair. But being as furry as Roger was, the oversight was understandable.
Sam also was left wondering what he was going to do with all the leftover raw eggs and fresh mice parts that no one seemed interested in even tasting.
Sam decided to donate the shoes and comb to charity and consume the leftovers a bit at a time until they were gone.
One present he did get excited about was the baby rattle that Blackie the crow brought. Sam was a Kingsnake and not only did he NOT posess a rattle…he wasn’t even venomous. But he had secretly admired that rattling sound that the Diamondbacks made when they needed to scare something or someone.
But perhaps the most appropriate and thoughtful of all of his presents was the jar of skin creme that Tommy Turtle gave him. It was time for Sam to shed his old skin and Tom’s gift would aid in making the shedding immeasurably more comfortable.
Yes…all in all, Sam had wonderful friends of the forest, but occasionally he did get quite lonely.
He was very tired after a long afternoon of partying and as Sam was beginning to nod off on a much-needed nap, he began to pleasantly wonder if there existed a snake species known as a Queen Snake.
MONEY TALKS by russ mckay
Jan 14
“George!”
“Abe!…ah….6042A
“No…3088D
“George….how did you get that notch there near the corner?”
“Oh, that….yeah….zipper nipped me as she pulled me out to pay for a balloon at the Dollar Store. LOVE THAT PLACE.”
“Zippers…yeah….why can’t humans stick to the soft old folding wallets?”
“Progress…I guess. I hate those vending machines too, though I will admit they do help with the wrinkles you know!”
“By the way, I saw dozens of new Franklins last week when I passed through the First National Bank. I kinda like the older versions of those bills that look more like us don’t you?”
“Ah…progress again….but yes we’re more…classic…traditional…Abe.”
“By the way…I don’t really like going through the Federal Banks. I’m always nervous that they’ll examine me and decide that I’m too worn to stay in circulation.”
“Oh you’ve got a long time before …ah….I hate to say it….but you know….the SHREDDING!”
“Let’s change the subject Abe…oh wait is she gonna?…..yep….well…see you again I hope!”
“You’re gonna be with lots of friends here at the Dollar Store….see ya! George.”
“Gosh it’s lonely in here now that George is gone. I hope we go to the supermarket. I love being in those cash trays with lots of other Lincolns.”
Then a new voice yelled out….”Hey….you’re puttin’ me in the wrong….oh no…..”
“What are you doing in here? You don’t belong here this compartment is just for bills, legal tender, CASH!”
“Listen, I don’t like it any more than you do Lincoln….Might as well make the best of it….I’m Visa but you can just call me “VEE”!
”Hey Mister James!” Ten year old Eric Samuel, from just down Clancy Lane, the one way street named for the very first family to build a house on the once dirt road leading out of the tiny town of Denver, North Carolina, yelled, then stopped and peered in at the sunlit porch of his old neighbor.
Ezra James, whose actual age had been possibly mentally forgotten by him or deceptively hidden from the knowledge of all other residents, was either sleeping in his Kennedy rocker, or was dead.
Eric was “sore afraid,” an expression he had picked up from Mr. James,…well, the boy feared that his very old friend was not asleep, but just looked that way.
Eric’s hands started to tremble, sorta like Mr. James’s wrinkled, but very warm hands often did.
Eric yelled again and leaned in a bit farther over the front yard, white, but needing paint, picket fence. Suddenly, Eric saw a hand move, then he spotted an arm go up and he breathed a long sigh, and just as he was about to say something, Ezra James yelled out in a strong clear voice…”Thought I was a goner did ya? Ha…well, not yet. Plenty more to do, plenty more! C‘mon in and sit a spell.”
Eric, having nothing to do besides trottin’ down to Mr. Shipley’s corner store to get a quarter pound of American cheese for his Mom to make grilled cheese sandwiches for lunch, opened the gate and then quickly got outta the way as the heavy cannonball on the chain slammed it back shut.
“Did the gate gitcha?”
“No Sir. I was quick. That’s fourteen straight times I cleared it!”
“Good for you. What’s the record?” Ezra asked.
“Twenty nine!”
“Got a ways to go yet, but we’ll surely celebrate thirty! Grab a chair.” Ezra pointed to the nearest one.
“Now today we’ll continue on our lessons about bein’ old and bein’ a young boy in the town of Denver.”
“You first Mr. James.”
“Well, it’s important when you get to be older that you keep track of following’ your dreams and your heart, and how you are doin’ on both.”
“You mean like getting good grades at school?” Eric tried making a comparison.
“Yeah, except it’s you givin’ AND gettin’ the personal grades and you gotta be honest with yourself…always! That’s important.”
“Hmm, well, I don’t know about heart, but I still wanna be a major league ball player when I get older. Is the heart stuff some kinda code for likin’ girls or something?”
“Well, that will sort itself out, but it’s all accordin’ to how you feel about the world and your place in it.”
“The world’s not very big in Denver.” Eric said.
“No, but big league ballplayers have come from tinier towns than this one!”
“ARE there tinier towns than here?” Eric asked.
“Sure! You’ve got lots to learn, but I do too and that’s one of the great things about life. You can keep learning all the way through!”
“What have you learned today Mr. James?”
“Well, I learned that your “not getting’ hit by the gate record” is at 14, and I ain’t dead! I’d say that’s a real good start!”
Then E
The boy complied and Ezra clasped his hand with Eric’s and squeezed and shook it up and down.
“Ouch!” Eric was rubbing his hand after the handshake.
“A might too strong maybe, but never be a weak limp handshaker Eric. That’s important.”
“Who invented the handshake Mr. James?”
“Not sure anybody knows, but it was a great long time ago.”
“I bet it started with cavemen. One guy had some food in his hand, and another caveman from a rival cave tried to snatch it out for himself and they grabbed hands; one trying to take it and one trying to keep it, until they both decided to split the food and become friends!”
“Well, Eric, if that ain’t the best explanation to the beginin’ of shakin’ hands, I don’t know of one!”
Then Ezra rocked back and said “So now teach me about bein’ a modern boy!”
“Well, it isn’t easy. Not by a long stretch!” (that expression, he had also picked up from Ezra and felt that it was the perfect place to put it into a sentence) I mean, you aren’t in charge of anything, not even your toys. And you’re shorter than most all
“And they make you eat food that’s good for you instead of food that tastes good, and you have to finish all of it, and also watch them eating whatever they want and as little of it or as much as they want!”
“And bedtime is always 9:00 and they stay up until all hours and I hear them laughing and enjoying everything and it keeps me awake sometimes!”
“Now calm down Eric, don’t get too riled up. The best thing about it is you’re young and when you grow up you can do whatever you want, within the law of course.” Ezra smiled at Eric.
“I know, but time goes too slow and I want to be an adult right now!” Eric folded his arms to his chest and looked very unhappy.
“Tell you what. “You be me and I’ll be you for ten minutes. Whadaya say?” Ezra suggested.
“Ok.” Ezra stood and went to the rocker.
“Oh I gotta get up?”
“Of
course, you’re the kid and I’m the ol…ah…adult!”
“Would
you be kind enough to go get me a cold coke outta the fridge young
man?” Eric said in a crackly voice.
“Do I really sound like that?” Ezra asked as he hobbled through the front screen door and went to the kitchen and got two cokes and slowly made his way through the house and back to the porch.
“Thanks, but you can‘t have a coke until you eat all of your supper young man!” Ezra admonished.
“Well, Ok.” Ezra laughed, but he enjoyed being referred to as “Young man!” and he watched Eric gulp down, and thoroughly enjoy, his soda.
“Your ten minutes are up! Now get outta my chair boy!” and they both laughed and resumed their places on the sunny porch and Ezra drank his coke.
Old Year’s Day by russ mckay
Dec 27
Sparky was having a nice day until Santa arrived. Santa said, “It’s new year’s eve… only 51 more weeks until Christmas.”
Sparky responded, “That’s plenty of time to get ready for Christmas 2019 isn’t it Santa?”
“Not if we’re going to make toys that take 52 weeks to build!”
Well, Santa was right about that but what efficient Elf would EVER take that long to do anything?
“Snoddington the elder elf would take even longer!” Santa responded!
Sparky knew that was true but Snoddington wasn’t due to retire until 2020.
Then Sparky had an idea. He whipped out his smartphone 3000 and called his new best friend that was the very best toy wrapper EVER!.
Yep…you guessed it Easter Bunny!
The Bunster showed up the very next morning with 5 million yards of Saranwrap and 50 million feet of red and green ribbon and 4 frozen jelly beans.
So no matter what you are doing this year or where you are doing it Santa, Sparky and the Easter Bunny will be wrapping presents for December 24, 2018 except for Easter morning when EB has the day off.
The National TV network is scheduling a game show this year at the North Pole to see who can wrap presents of various and sundry sizes and weights and be declared “Wrapper of The World!”
Be sure to tune in!
‘Twas the day after Christmas
And all through the store
Great lines of people
stretched out of the door
They carried those presents
Unwrapped and unwanted
That they received yesterday
They were tired but undaunted
“I want to get something
In exchange for my gift
It’s been a tiring Christmas
And I need a lift!”
“That’s not why I’m here
Oh no, no…. not me
I just love my present
But I already have three!”
“I’m bringing mine back
That I got from my Honey
It’s kinda nice
But I’d rather have money!”
“I really like my gift
In fact, I think it’s great
But it was given to me
By someone I hate!”
“I can’t wait in line
Very long in this store
I’ve got other presents
That came from five more”
“I’ve got no time for this
And it’s a heck of a trek
We had family over
And the house is a wreck!”
“I know what you mean
I’m the same way too
I’m so glad it’s over
There’s too much to do”
“Well I’m very happy
To be in this store
Because counting today
There’s 364 more…
Days until Christmas
The most it can be
And the more days there are
The happier are we!”
And there were those too,
Who were saddened a bit
They only were there
‘Cause their gifts didn’t fit!
So Santa was finished
And Christmas was done
But the post Christmas cleanup
Is surely not fun
But it is a
Every year at this time
And we have to give gifts
Almost spend our last dime
But it’s good for business
So it never ends
That’s why were all here
With most of our friends
Then one tiny hand
Reached out…tugged a skirt
“God hear’s you talking
And I know it must hurt
It’s his baby’s birthday
Jesus his son
That’s why we have Christmas
‘Cause he loved everyone
For our gift He gave Jesus
To us one and all…
Our gift’s in the manger
And not in the mall!”